last night was pretty horrific. I'm pretty ashamed actually, phoned home treatment at aout 2 am and literally BEGGED for some lorazipam to help me calm down. I had the most awful thoughts in my head and i couldnt see at all that it would be any different in the morning.
but
i'm feeling a little less tense. The sun is pretty shiny today:) and i feel like maybe i could get somewhere with this today. I've got a few things i'd like to try and do. The guy i like from HTT helped me to make up a kind of dayplan thing, and i rekon its going to help me today. I've had breakfast. I can generally spak about getting up ans dressed, blogging, emails, whatever until about 12, when its lunchtime. Then i'm going to go to the park, and try and make sense of all the college work i have to get done and when by. I have to read throughmy care plan befor emy discharge meeting with HTT tomorrow. And i made a deal with him that i would go back to college on monday morning, and he would make sure he was at my discharge meeting to help me explain what would help me.
im going to find something pretty and vicki style to wear to college tomorow.which means something fairly ridiculous.
cos ive got to get on with it sometime, right?
xxx
Irregular Choice Festive Footwear 2022: Day 20
3 years ago
Posts
4 comments:
Hi lovely, I'm so glad you noticed the sun, and that you are doing things that are YOU. I hope the rest of your day is okay!
xxxxxx
Sorry to hear about your tough night, but love the way you've planned out your day, and I hope it's a lovely sunny one for you my dear.
Wearing something Vicki style sounds like a plan dude! I love wearing ridiculous clothes :-)
Sarah x
ps I've never seen skins (does that make me deprived?) but I'm amused that you now associate me with chilli eating. Maybe this is the next step for me, perhaps even a future career? professional chilli eating...hmmm
I am glad you got through the night, no matter how horrific it was, you did it hun and I'm so proud of you! I really hope your day is relatively calm and okayish at least. I'm glad the sun is shinning. While you are ready to start your day, I am ready to go to bed. I hope we both have an okay monday :-)
*hugs*
Sarah
i am so glad you made it through the storm of the night, sometimes the sun coming out takes a lot of the anxiety away I have found. i am proud of you too. and it sounds like you have a good plan for today.
the reason for my relapse was because i deviated from my meal plan a few days ago and when i spoke to my friend who has been an addict she reminded me no plan at all is a plan to fail, and that making a plan and sticking to it is a really important part of recovery, and time and consistency makes recovery.
so right she is!!!
so i love you vicki-ness when it comes to all this cool music and clothes and bows, i love cheesy boy bands and i watched a doco on the spice girls and i used to have a dance to every song! i thought of you! oh my god i have the worst addiction, i have found katie prices show on the net and i love it... how terrible is that. "what katie did next" oh god.... how embarrassing, but I LOVE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
shes crazy! hahahahah
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