i think im having my breakdown
you know what?isnt anybody gonna help you through but yourself.ive given upwoth services, they can kiss my arse.im sick of their 'pas the buck games' and im sick of getting no where.
i only wanted to talk
whats so wrong with that
i've stopped being able to again now, because im constantly getting told not to think about it, and if i try to talk, the subject gets changed.
iguess im back to leaving it all inside.the way its always been.its exactly a year, pretty much since i poured my heart out to my doc, and admitted everything that had happened-at uni, how my mum is, and everything in between.and ive got exactly nowhere.i just wanted someone to liste and tell me its ok. but hey, im going back to the-ive got no problems, everything is great approach to life, cos obviously, they all think im totally fine.
i think i crashed and burned.
Irregular Choice Festive Footwear 2022: Day 20
3 years ago
Posts
3 comments:
I'm so sorry that no one will listen to you--you can always email me even though it's not really talking--I really, really don't mind at all. Please do. And I hate that everyone seems to think that things are fine with you but please don't let this drive you backward. In some respects this is kind of what happened to me last year--I felt like everyone had pretty much given up on me, no one wanted to deal with my ED and my problems and I kind of realized that I was on my own. And that no one but me was going to be there for me. And strangely this actually drove me to try and recover because it made me realize that no one else was ever going to give me the help I needed. I was going to have to be my own help and the rest of them could fuck themselves. I know it's not the same thing, but I think you can see this as a kind of fuck-them moment. If they won't help you that doesn't mean you can't get help or that things can't get better. It's their fault and not yours.
Likewise, you can email me. It's hard when people don't provide the support you need. I guess that at the end of the day you are your own best advocate, and there are always steps you can take, no matter how small, to make things a little better.
As Jessie says, fuck them, and maybe you are better off without 'help' that ends up making things worse rather than better.
Maybe write out everything that's on your mind at the moment and try to break it down into manageable chunks? Idk this usually helps me, and there is usually something small you can do about each little piece, even if it's more about productively dealing with rather than actually solving the problem.
Just some ideas...
Sarah x
I'm sorry hun! You have had an absolutely crappy time of late and I wish I could say anything or do something to help you and to make you feel any better at all. You can also email me if you like as well.
*hugs*
Sarah
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