This is NOT a Pro ED/SI blog. I'm not pretending to be perfect, i'm not recovered, but I WANT to be.

today you are you
that is truer than true
there is no-one alive
who is youer than you

Friday, 19 March 2010

TRIGGER WARNING-si issues

Oh fuck(pardon moi francais)

i feel like i want to do it again

and it will only be ok if its worse

no no NOO

fuck

i dont want to.but i do.i want it to be different.it wont chnge how i feel.but it might help.FUCK

i hate myself so completely right now.i dont even know why im posting about this.im sorry

arg

xxx

4 comments:

mariposai said...

Take a deep breath. This doesn't have to happen. Don't hate yourself. Don't blame yourself. You don't need more punishment. You need TLC.

I've just emailed you - distract yourself by reading it.

Keep writing blog posts until the urge goes, do anything. Even if every post just says Vics is amazing 100 times over. The urge to do this will fade in time.

Hugs hugs hugs

Sarah x

battleinmind said...

Lovely Vicki, never say sorry for how you feel.
You know that distraction list you emailed me about? Go find it, and work through them.

Lots of love xxxx

Lou Lou said...

sending so much strength to you
you are a beautiful diamond!!!!

go on gmail chat?
much love

Sairs said...

hun, you need to go to the hopsital, you really really really do! Please be safe! Sending you lots a love!
*hugs*
Sarah