so, im like one step closer to not having a stomach left.yay me.
I am such an idiot.I dont have time for bedrest!college, and college and more college, and arguing with benefit people (i am now recieving a whole £7.50 a fortnight!) and and and...well it just goes on from there really.
i wish someone one would take me seriously and help me.i know its a pathetic thing to say.but i cant do the whole 'your ok, go home and play with the playdough' thing anymore.I think i need to go Ip somewhere. Problems-nowhere in cornwall.even Ed service one see me-as they dont tend to deal much with bulimia except send you to group-which triggers the fuck out of me. Only free counselling service wont see me cos of self harm risk-they think i need more support. CRASAC service can only offer group, as they have no funds right now.I cant afford to pay for therapy/counselling.
what the fuck am i supposed to do.im sick of arguing for help-the whole process makes me feel i dont deserve it-or surely id be getting it.
which is probably true-cos lets face it, im not exactly being intelligent right now.
i feel so triggered to cut right now.cos thats really gonna help.
fucking hell
i give up
xxxxx
Irregular Choice Festive Footwear 2022: Day 20
3 years ago
Posts
4 comments:
You do deserve support Vic. The fact that you have not recieved adequate support so far is down to the NHS and other organisations being crap, rather than it being a case of you not deserving it, because you DO.
It sounds as though you have been largely disadvantaged by location and the accessibility of services in your area.
You need some kind of advocate, or someone who can help you access the help you need. I'm wondering if there is some kind of charity that could help with this? Have you tried your GP again?
It makes me so mad that you have to fight so hard for what you are entitled to, but always remember that you DO deserve the help, and failure to provide it is a reflection on the service itself rather than you.
Hugs
Sarah x
I agree. This is not your fault that you haven't received the help you need. I wish I could say something to help you but since I don't live in the same country, I have no idea how things work there. I just want you to know that I'm thinking of you!
*hugs*
Sarah
I don't know you that well, but it's pretty obvious you are a survivor of many things, and it's not your fault, as the others said, that you don't have the help you need. Try not to give up. I think you express yourself well, and I'm sorry you are in so much pain.
When you go to uni you should be able to get help easily, normally they're very useful with stuff like that. I always find when I get urges like that (though I've never actually done anything) turning it outwards helps - though I recommend punching the crap out of a pillow or something until you're knackered rather than a wall like I did once. ouch.
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