I've been better...

I really have been better

Feeling very panicky and worried about filling time when I leave the day unit at the end of August. I can't bear going back to being by myself all the time, having no one to talk with, and just the day to day-ness of it all. I can't bear being that lonely again. Even knowing its only a month or so later I go back to Uni isn't helping- because I go back I to a different year, where I know even less people than I did last year, which really is saying something.

The panic and worry is so bad, so there and consuming, that I already think I'd rather be dead.

I can't can't can't do this. I'm so tied of being on my own.